If this was another time of the day then I could tell you a lot of negative things about teenage relationships but right now it's all I can be thinkin' of. I just watched Cadillac Records and at the end Beyonce as the young Etta James sung I'd Rather Go Blind. Watching it you're like, ooohhh no that line! it's about his wife! and that other line, its about him! no no no no, etta james let me cradle you. she keeps looking back at Leonard Chess played by Adrien Brody with these tears welling up in her eyes, then he walks out but he pauses just before he leaves the door and she just has tears streaming down her cheeks. Anyway, that's probably my favourite scene in the film. That song is so god damn good, it got me thinking. I realised having "things" with people "casual" things, the whole idea of "dating" and not being tied down is pretty simple. Perhaps at one end its keeping your options open, wiiiiide open like an impressionable girls legs who thinks you're the one for her just before you fuck her and fuck her over. You tell that boy you can't commit but really it's cos you don't care enough or are waiting for something better to come along? A little 500 days of summer? In the song, she sings "I would rather go blind boy, then to see you walk away from me". to me, that was like cutting your loses in a relationship to avoid the pain which funnily enough hurts more you more than anything. oh etta, you walk another way but you'll end up at the same dead end.
Don't we just want to lie next to someone or feel the weight of someone on top of us - bear that weight. hold hands. kiss. find some throwdown. hair to run through. light at the end of your tunnel.
winters coming. feels like ice. i have a feeling this is going to be a long winter. we all better find someone to share a blankey with. if you have someone already, keep them in your bed for me.
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