I dreamt a dream

here's one for old times' sake. While we may not have cashed in on the perfect (actually pathetic) excuse to avoid study this exam break as well as we should have, I mean to be fair I did in fact try semi hard this time around, here i am to make up for it. You see BlogBear did try save face and she did try very hard to single-handedly shine a light of support out to all the procrastinators out there, clinging onto the piece of wood, desperately blowing at their whistles trying to keep fucking distracted. And luckily for all those lost souls of the Atlantic BlogBear was there happy to accept your screeching call, unlike Dirtbag who's still coming to mature from her five year old self's dis contempt with them whistle blowing efforts.
You know, now that i think about it, BlogBear really is the savior. It's true about what she said, that I've been going to bed at a fat cat approved time. seriously, by 9.00 I start to freak out and by 9.07 i start upwardly rolling around and trying to find my misplaced blanket because you see, i just can't comprehend not being in bed by that time. Which makes this post in particularly interesting and brings me to the crux of it. You see it's 2.02 am. And why am i up so late? well self inflicted question, I'm writing an essay! uh-huh! yes i am :)!
You see there are these things called deadlines which, i have to say, i don't really know much about. I mean are they nice guys? well groomed? maybe they're the kind to stop talking humour or to stop probing wide mouthed responses when you have a bit of that flakey stuff which comes off of walnuts stuck to your front tooth instead of actually telling you that that little flakey thing is redesigning you as a hillbilly? or maybe they're a million other things, but the truth is i don't know what they're like because I've never met one. A deadline that is. I have never, in my entire high school life met a deadline. Not once have a handed in an assignment or whatever they wanna call it in on time. aren't you proud to be reading the wise words of such a dead beat. aaaaaaaaaanyways, my failures aside and back to the post, actually no, not aside, let us delve way back into them failures because here i am at now 2.09 am conforming to my non-elitist self. Yes, you guessed it, this essay that I'm writing is overdue. So overdue in fact that i was awoken this morning not by some character from a pixies song reincarnated as my fireplace but by my English literature teacher who had rung my home phone. what really got me beat up over this was that I'm mad about this woman, i think she's the coolest, I'd go gay for her, I'd do anything for her (except respect her as a teacher and hand in my work as she asks). And then it's just so embarrassing that I answered the phone unaware of who i was speaking to. It's not like i said anything wrong I just would have liked to have sounded cooler, you know, like worked in a Heart of Darkness quote into my greeting to the receiver. Anyways she was calling to firstly ask if I'd written my essay, "no" and then secondly to tell me that if it wasn't in by 8.00 Friday morning i would receive a zero mark. I wasn't really fussed by this but the reason it features in the post is just to let you know why I'm up now. And the point of that was to explain why it is that I'm reverting back to my old ways and bringing this darling blog back to it's glory days of impossibly large number of posts written during the only times we get to prove ourselves to all those people who don't even deserve to know us. ALAS, this post, right now, which you are reading is the post which is going to save your dear old pal Dirtbag from sweet dreams, that is this post or Freddie Kruger. your choice.

So I did actually have an idea planned for this post before it got boycotted by my need to fail and that idea was to tell you how my brother just got us chocolate.

and to understand why I'd want to share that with whoever chooses to read this far into a very pointless (debaters may relate this post to a spoon or a block of cheese or a sponge) post i must tell you about this grand epiphany i had a few weeks ago.

oh yes, a few weeks ago i suddenly realised that the only question which i really needed to ask myself at that exact moment in my life and time and space was why i had not yet realised the full potential of talking to my brother on fb chat. Now while i think I made it clear that I'm quite the deadbeat, you, reader, may not have made the link that this leaves me a little simple in some departments and am amazed a little more often than most people. so to me this was in fact a HUUUUUGE revelation and I laughed just at the possible things which i could say to him, like "yo loser" or "sup" or "cunt" or "mom's hell angry don't you reckon?" or anything. but you see something happened and i never got onto these grand plans of mine, however tonight, my brother did.

Scumbag
want me to get top deck chocolate from the shell?

and with that he made my night.

and with that (which is in reference to everything you just read) i continue to fail. yay.