Save the life of my childhood

Ever since... well you know I can't really say when. The obvious point was year six but then I think of year five, year four, man year three especially I only fucked around. That seems stupid to say; an eight year old fucked around in school, but that's how it was for me.
My parents should have named me trouble because that's what I am to them, that's how they see me. Or have set a sign on my bedroom door declaring the inside land Trouble then they could answer when someone asked where I was most of the time, "she's in trouble". However most often I am in school. The same school in fact. This is my thirteenth year. Now, I don't remeber much about life before school- I have a few memories of kindy and other earlier ones which I must suspect only to be implanted from photographs, dreams, imagination and home videos rather than actually being my own. So School, in particular this one school, has been so far, my entire life; all that I have ever known. It is where I mostly am. Therefore I think it'd be in the best interest of my parents' humor to have enrolled me into Trouble rather than this other institution. I am in the institution, I am in trouble. That's my life. So since this is how my parents see me, I can only say to you and hope you understand that from my upbringing, from how my parents impressioned me, that in year three I really did fuck around.
Year two I just remeber comeing late from lunch one day and having to sit a fractions test that I hadn't studied for. I remember it so well, trying to wing and cheat my way through it. Year one I remember it was the spelling tests, searching the room for a poster with that certain word on it.
You see I cannot quite find the point in my life when I began slacking off in school. All I can see is that I am me through and through. Just then, I thought of all my school years and cannot help seeing me in it all. No shit. but I mean seeing the things I do now. It's like seeing my hands in photographs; I know they're my hands but why do they have to looks so fucking much like my hands!