101 Things

Dirtbag and Blogbear love:

1. Big, fat, glorious magazines with seeminly more adverts than content.



2. Constantly talking shit with friends.



3. Accents. Hearing them, guessing them, imitating them. South African to American. All good.



4. The fact that Sexy Music Man is back. The man of my 14 year old's dream. The man who literally made girls "head over heels".



5. Dumb bitches.



6. Nudity. "Here, we’ve only got a few options in how to react to the naked body: be aroused, be amused, or be repulsed. Boo to that." Hey Nuuuuude, don't make it bare take a short skirt and make it shorterer...



7. The idea of having a gun pointed to our faces and asked for our last words and offering a nonchalant shrug "dun matta".



8. People who can multiply decimals in their head because it's suprisingly sexy.



9. Knowing that Bindi Irwin is subject to a ventriloquist up her bot bot.



10. Taking the blows in my face and my body.



11. The Assassination of Our Futures by the Coward Procrastination.



12. Sarcastic jokes about and during inappropiate situations.



13. When people don't acknowledge us and avoid eye contact.



14. Filling our sorrows with the words we borrowed.



15. Morgan Freeman narrating my life in one ear whilst Adrien Brody whispers sweet nothings in another.



16. Kisses on the nose and ear.



17. Quotes said at the correct moment which allow you to win life with one smart arse comment at a time.



18. Public displays of affection.



19. Calling for whores to fill our empty, empty.. cavaties. Slut! I need somebody. Slut! Not just anybody.



20. When fat people kiss with their eyes open on rides at the royal show.



21. "Never take it seriously, if you never take it seriously, you never get hurt, you never get hurt, you always have fun, and if you ever get lonely, just go to the record store and visit your friends."